Embacing “MUM GUILT”-It’s ok to seek support

Hey there fellow mamas,

As I sit here reflecting on the Easter holidays that didn't quite go as planned, I find myself enveloped in that familiar embrace of mum guilt. It's a feeling that many of us know all too well - that nagging sense of not doing enough, not being present enough, not being the supermom we envision ourselves to be.

This holiday season, I had it all mapped out. My older daughters were enrolled in an arts and craft club from 9 to 2 each day, giving me the precious time I needed to work, focus on my pilot assessments for my MIM practitioner qualification, and steal some quality moments with my youngest. It seemed like the perfect balance of productivity and family time. But there, lurking in the shadows, the mum guilt crept in- why am I trying to juggle in the holidays? Why am I sending off 2 children when i should be with them all?

But life had other plans. My little one fell ill with gastroenteritis, turning our holiday into a whirlwind of cleaning up vomit, endless cycles of laundry, and comforting a sick child. Suddenly, my carefully crafted plans went out the window, and with them came a new tidal wave of mum guilt. I found myself questioning my choices. Why wasn't I able to juggle it all? Why was I at home, not working on my projects, while my older girls were at clubs? Was I failing as a mother?

But then, amidst the chaos and self-doubt, it hit me - seeking help is not a sign of weakness; it's an act of strength. It's okay to lean on others, whether it's a friend, a family member, or yes, even clubs and activities that give us the breathing space we need.

As mums, we often carry the weight of the world on our shoulders, striving to be everything to everyone. Mum guilt, in its essence, stems from our desire to be the best mothers we can be to our young. It's a testament to the profound responsibility we feel towards our children, the longing to provide them with everything they need and more. In this sense, mum guilt isn't necessarily a negative force; rather, it's a reflection of the unconditional love we have for our little ones, and an essential component of nurturing and rearing our families. However, when left unchecked, it has the potential to consume us, clouding our judgment and leading to feelings of inadequacy. But here's the thing - mum guilt doesn't need to be all-consuming. It can coexist alongside self-compassion, balance, and a healthy dose of perspective.It's okay to ask for help, to admit that we can't do it all alone.

So, to all the mums out there wrestling with mum guilt, I want you to know that you're not alone. It's okay to let go of the unrealistic expectations we place on ourselves and embrace the support that surrounds us. Whether it's a helping hand with childcare, a sympathetic ear to listen, or simply a moment of self-compassion, remember that it's all part of the journey of motherhood.

Let's lift each other up, celebrate our victories, and navigate through the challenges together. Because in the end, it's not about being perfect; it's about being there for our children in the best way we know how - with love, resilience, and a willingness to ask for help when we need it most.

With love and solidarity

Chloe XXX